Author Archives: Ruth Perry

TBKW 2020 Review and Reflections

Welcome to TBKW’s Year End Review post – better late than never, right?

~ ~ ~ 2020 STATS ~ ~ ~

Here, on the blog, there were 14,072 views, primarily to the home page and then to these posts with the most direct traffic:

#1 – The Transformative Power of Good Leadership is an oldie from 2017 that got a lot of circulation from Pinterest in 2020. I’m so happy because this is written about one of my favorite TED Talks and I would love more people to encounter this!

#2 – Francis Chan, the NEO House Network, and Women in Leadership – another oldie from 2016 that is a common search result for people wondering if Chan is complementarian or egalitarian, I believe. I share the Full Gospel Church story from Seoul, Korea – how they became the largest church in the world by empowering women to lead.

#3 – R.C. Sproul on the Role of Men and Women – I gave an egalitarian position to each of his sermon points on the topic of male headship and female submission. My response posts always do well and I enjoy writing them, so I think I will find a few more complementarians to respond to in 2021.

I wrote eight new posts in 2020, ranked below by my favorite rather than date posted or traffic stats:

God hears the prayers of the oppressed – Y’all, there is a right side to be on when we’re talking about racism in America, and much of the white evangelical church ain’t on it. Scripture is clear that God cares for the oppressed. “History has it’s eyes on you.”
Her father’s joy – the story of Abigail – Notes on one of my favorite Bible women (I named my daughter Abigail)
Abigail Sequel – What about Submission? – and a follow-up post regarding what Abigail’s story has to teach us about submission
On being a bad feminist who tolerates all kinds of nonsense, but also having no patience for bad depictions of God’s love – I read Francine Rivers’ terrible book “Redeeming Love” and wrote about how this was an abusive depiction of God’s love rather than God’s actual unconditional love
Holy Post – Race in America – my transcription of Phil Vischer’s excellent video on racism in America
Quoting the Fathers of Complementarianism – a link to a Facebook album I made of disgusting, misogynistic quotes from theologians and pastors
Voices of Protest – links to social media accounts I recommended for understanding the #BLM protests of 2020
Recovering from Biblical Manhood and Womanhood by Aimee Byrd – book recommendation

2020 was also the year that I bit the bullet and paid $19 to take “wordpress” out of the blog url: http://www.thebeautifulkingdomwarriors.com looks so much more legit.

I’ve heard that blogging is dead, people don’t read blogs anymore and I’m okay with that. I’m always behind the curve, definitely not trailblazing or trendsetting. The joy for me comes in the writing and I celebrate the rare “Like” or comment on the blog.

Meanwhile, on The Beautiful Kingdom Warriors Facebook page, 2020 brought some significant traffic upticks. Facebook has become the place where I post the articles and posts I’ve come across and found important, the musings of theologians and activists that I follow, and tons of memes – the clear winner as far as reach goes. I had my first viral post last February:

I can’t remember exactly how many people “liked” TBKW before this post, I think it was around 3K. That doubled in February, and with more people engaging on the page, my posts picked up traction. I ended the year with close to 9k follower and my reach is usually around 600k per month.

I’ve increasingly expanded beyond gender issues (egalitarianism vs. complementarianism, sex abuse, domestic violence, rape culture, purity culture, abortion, etc.) to include posts about racism, politics, trauma, theology, evangelical culture, etc. This leads to some unliking and unfollowing the page while others find the page because of similar values and concerns. I haven’t figured out the best way to encourage people to stick around, to communicate that I don’t want the page to be a vacuum of confirmation bias. I want pushback. I am just one person posting things I come across on the internet. I am not trying to be an authority on or guardian of The Truth. I have learned a lot and am so grateful for everyone who sticks around and engages in the conversations, especially when there is disagreement. I love engaging with kind people who help me understand things better.

As much as I would like more diversity, TBKW seems to resonate most with younger Christians, primarily women and US citizens, with similar political views. I am grateful to receive messages thanking me and to see “mentions” recommending TBKW to their friends as a safe community to grow in faith. Like myself, others have felt less lonely because of TBKW.

Getting personal……2020 Reflections:

As it has been for several years, my writing is harried and sporadic. I could find something to write about every day, if I wasn’t stretched so thin and had the mental space to let the words flow. Mostly, I am clinging to others’ words in my Enneagram 5 need to learn, and never process what I am learning through writing. This grieves me.

Life in 2020 was overwhelming in many ways. On top of a global pandemic and its financial impact, I am a working mom whose “free time” is consumed with housework and homeschooling. I was worried about my husband’s health (he finally received a diagnosis and treatment in November), my brother was in a life-threatening car accident, and my kids were struggling to find their groove in quarantine.

Embarrassingly, the hair that broke the camel’s back was turning 40 during a pandemic. I had dreamed about traveling to celebrate with my closest friends. Reaching the “middle-aged” milestone was jarring when I realized my entire life was in survival mode. I was treading water, fighting to stay ahead of bills and work shifts and supporting my family. I had assumed that by 40, I would figure out my health issues. I had unrequited academic dreams and writing goals. I was having a mid-life crisis and I. was. not. okay.

So I asked for help. First, I reached out to a former pastor. She is a gifted counselor and we set up a weekly phone chat. Collette was a precious guide out of the darkness, making sense of my emotions and offering her “me too” stories, encouragement to rest, resource recommendations, and hope that this season would pass.

Second, I signed up for counseling on Better Help and began weekly sessions with Berty. She told me that I was over functioning for others, I was captive to the tyranny of the urgent, and I was angry like a lot of women my age because I was realizing that I had given my life away. She encouraged me to reclaim my life and make SMART goals (Specific, Measurable, Actions, Realistic, Timeframe). She said we overestimate what we can accomplish in one year and underestimate what we can accomplish in ten years. She gave me homework each week that led to setting up a writing space for myself in our guest room and to writing the 8 posts that I managed to share.

I love my new writing space!

When I went back to work at the restaurant and the kids went back to school in August, I thanked Collette and Berty and said I wouldn’t have time anymore for their support. I could certainly use support still, but I am much improved. They had been lifesavers, pulling me out of my burned out pit. This fall, I put my caretaker hat on to help my mom through a big surgery in October and then a broken ankle in November. Then we all got COVID in December and had a huge scare when my mom had to be hospitalized. Praise God we all recovered. Mom was ecstatic to move home in January but we’ve missed having her here with us.

Two and a half weeks ago, I had a hysterectomy. My Facebook posts have tripled and I have been commenting much more during recovery! But that will level out and I am committing to writing more posts here on the blog in 2021. The Beautiful Kingdom Warriors is an outlet for me that gives me a sense of purpose and releases my pent up need to process my thoughts. There are so many things I would like to write about, so I am going to utilize my new SMART goals tool and get to it.

I thank you all for following TBKW. It is incredible that we get to partner with God to bring God’s Kingdom values and love to our communities. We can truly manifest God’s will on earth as it is in heaven through our unique gifts and callings. Let us continue to encourage one another, inspire one another, and urge one another on to love and good deeds. God bless!

Quoting the Fathers of Complementarianism

I created an album on The Beautiful Kingdom Warriors Facebook page with sexist quote memes from influential theologians, past and present.

The album caption reads:

I made these memes to illustrate the origins of today’s complementarian (i.e. patriarchal) beliefs. Some complementarians simply appear unable to recognize the deeply ingrained sexism of their worldview. Just because they can’t see it, doesn’t mean it isn’t there:

Sexism [sek-siz-uh m] noun
1. attitudes or behavior based on traditional stereotypes of sexual roles.

2. discrimination or devaluation based on a person’s sex, as in restricted job opportunities; especially, such discrimination directed against women.

Ideas. Have. Consequences. Reading the Bible through a patriarchal lens devalues the imago dei (image of God) in women – who were created to share dominion with men (Genesis 1:28) and are gifted by the Holy Spirit to build the Kingdom alongside their brothers (Galatians 3:28).

These quotes are not the sum contribution of these theologians and pastors. Even great minds are only human and are marred by sin and an imperfect cultural bias. Every single human being is wrong about a lot of things, and I am not writing off everything they ever wrote about God and the Bible because I believe they were wrong about women.

However, it is also important to acknowledge that patriarchy stems from the curse and has been harmful to women and to the work of the Church. It is still present in this fallen world and in the Bride of Christ. Thankfully, Jesus is redeeming the fallen nature of the world and cleansing his Church of all impurities. Patriarchy will one day be a stain on the history of the Church rather than a present reality.

Send me more quotes and I will add to this album!

“Complementarian” refers to a theological view that men and women have different but complementary roles and responsibilities in marriage, family life, and religious leadership. Essentially, the view begets spiritual authority to men and subjugates women. The language (e.g. “complementary,” “equal but different”) can imply a harmless view, but it is inherently abusive to create hierarchy where God intends equality and to bar women from fulfilling their callings and using their gifts (Genesis 1:28, Galatians 3:28, etc.). All image bearers are created to have dominion and all believers have the Holy Spirit. Christ is the head of his Church and we are to submit to one another out of deference for Christ (Ephesians 5:21).

Here is a sample of the memes:

Please go to The Beautiful Kingdom Warriors on Facebook to share this album! And comment below if you know of more quotes you would add. Thank you!

God hears the prayers of the oppressed

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The Lord works righteousness and justice for all who are oppressed.
Psalm 103:6

God is moving in the United States of America. As Christians, have we discerned where the Holy Spirit is taking us? Are we aligning ourselves with the redemptive plan of God?

In an article published this week, Robert Jones, CEO and founder of the Public Religion Research Institute, wrote that white Christians are consistently more likely to deny systemic racism than religiously unaffiliated white Americans. “Our fellow African American citizens, and indeed the entire country, are waiting to see whether we white Christians can finally find the humility and courage and love to face the truth.”

I have heard white Christians suggest that the upheaval in the United States today is because as a nation, we have turned away from God and have removed prayer from schools and society. We need Jesus, they say. This sentiment reminds me of the prophet Jeremiah’s words, “They dress the wound of my people as though it were not serious. ‘Peace, peace,’ they say, when there is no peace” (Jeremiah 6:14). There is no peace without justice. Justice and righteousness are central to the heart of God.

What we are seeing today is the cumulative effect of centuries of oppression and discrimination. Dressing the wound of racism with platitudes of returning to God is a misdiagnosis of the root of the upheaval. A misdiagnosis can be fatal when the illness is terminal.

For Black Christians, the fragile flicker of hope in a just, equitable life in the U.S. has been rekindled. In a gorgeous essay written two days before his death, Rep. John Lewis wrote, “While my time here has now come to an end, I want you to know that in the last days and hours of my life you inspired me. You filled me with hope about the next chapter of the great American story when you used your power to make a difference in our society.”

The centuries of prayers for God’s intervention to end their oppression have been heard. America has not turned from Christianity – America was never Christian because it has always been marred by the ugliness of racial oppression. God’s wrath burns against racism and God’s heart is with the oppressed.

God is truly healing our land, and it is painful but necessary to cut deep in order to remove the cancer of racism from our marrow. Our culture is embedded with racism, and we have believed the lies of the enemy that have dehumanized and dishonored the Black community.

Jesus’ heart is broken by the discrimination and violence perpetrated against BIPOC, who bear God’s image and are endued with the holy calling of dominion and care that all of God’s children are called to. The time is NOW to follow the Holy Spirit in the work of dismantling white supremacy and redeeming American society to be equitable for all.

It is wrong for white Christians to cast themselves as the persecuted minority here in America. Beginning with the Catholic Church’s “Doctrine of Discovery” that baptized global colonization and its’ accompanying atrocities, to the American church’s sanctification of chattel slavery and advocacy for segregation, up to this day’s white Evangelical racial resentment, we have much to lament. In reading the biblical narrative, white Christians ought to identify ourselves with the powerful Egyptian empire, Babylonian empire, or Roman empire, rather than the captive Israelites. We have been the oppressors, not the oppressed.

The Bible is clear where God’s heart lies on the issue of justice for racial oppression.

Isaiah’s prophecy described the agenda the Messiah would champion:

Isaiah 42:1-4
“Behold, My Servant, whom I uphold;
My chosen one in whom My soul delights.
I have put My Spirit upon Him;
He will bring forth
justice to the nations.
“He will not cry out or raise His voice,
Nor make His voice heard in the street.
“A bruised reed He will not break
And a dimly burning wick He will not extinguish;
He will faithfully bring forth
justice.
“He will not be disheartened or crushed
Until He has established
justice in the earth;
And the coastlands will wait expectantly for His law.”

When Jesus became flesh and dwelt with us, he announced his earthly ministry with this mission statement:

“The Spirit of the Lord is upon me, because he has anointed me to
proclaim good news to the poor. He has sent me to
proclaim liberty to the captives and recovering of sight to the blind,
to set at liberty those who are oppressed,
to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor.”
Luke 4:18-19

In the Sermon on the Mount in Matthew chapter 5, Jesus shared the values of his kingdom with these declarations:

“Blessed are the poor in spirit,
for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
Blessed are those who mourn,
for they will be comforted.
Blessed are the meek,
for they will inherit the earth.
Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness,
for they will be filled.
Blessed are the merciful,
for they will be shown mercy.
Blessed are the pure in heart,
for they will see God.
Blessed are the peacemakers,
for they will be called children of God.
10 Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness,
for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

11 “Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me. 12 Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you.

To hunger and thirst for righteousness is to desire justice for those who have been wronged. The Bible exhorts us to seek justice throughout its pages (this is a small sample of examples):

“Learn to do good; seek justice, correct oppression; bring justice to the fatherless, and please the widow’s cause,” (Isaiah 1:17).

“He has told you, O man, what is good; and what does the Lord require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God?” (Micah 6:8).

“Blessed are they who observe justice, who do righteousness at all times!” (Psalm 106:3)

“To do righteousness and justice is more acceptable to the Lord than sacrifice.” (Proverbs 21:3)

“Open your mouth for the mute, for the rights of all who are destitute. Open your mouth, judge righteously, defend the rights of the poor and needy.” (Proverbs 31:8-9)

These are my thoughts today as we continue to reckon with the centuries-long history of racial oppression in our country. Our God is our Redeemer, the great Physician who is healing us and bringing us closer and closer to the time when our Prince of Peace will rule with justice and mercy. God hears the prayers of the oppressed, God’s heart is for the brokenhearted, and God is always healing his beloved Creation. Be encouraged. We have no reason to fear and all reason to hope. God is good, all the time.


Here are a couple more excellent links I encountered recently:

Climbing the Mountain of Injustice – sermon by Austin Channing Brown (I ugly cried listening to this – SO powerful!)
Justice Too Long Delayed – by Christianity Today editor Timothy Dalrymple

And I linked to these articles above but want to make sure you don’t miss them:

Racism among white Christians is higher than among the nonreligious – Robert Jones
Together, You Can Redeem the Soul of Our Nation – Rep. John Lewis
Racial resentment varies widely among religious groups – Ryan Burge

White Christianity has been complicit in the subjugation of our Black brothers and sisters. We must lament our racial sins and demonstrate true repentance.

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